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3may2014.txt

Fat, Dumb and Lazy in the Domination of Eiler


The Domination of Eiler has returned to its Western District of Dominance in Bothell-Washington to resume its regular patrols. This came after four months of tourism, fine food, and less exercise than usual. So there was some risk of the Dominator being too fat, dumb and lazy to handle his duties. Fortunately "fat, dumb and lazy" is different for the Domination of Eiler than for most of its citizens.

- "Fat" means the Dominator is at record weight, but still fits in the same-size shirts and trousers as in 1990. The Domination adjusted nicely to the resumption of aerobic exercise, though weightlifting was a definite shock at first.

- "Dumb" means the Domination Guard engineering force is still able to reconstruct its technical notes from scratch after the phone company destroyed them, maintain web server code, and be on point for a team response to the famous Heartbleed Bug.

- And the Domination's artistic corps was just awarded the RACCie Rabbit-Breeder's Cup for how "Lazy" it was while drawing those Powernaut comics during vacation.

As Doctor Manhattan once said, "Jon rebuilt his self. What made you think I couldn't?"


Today is the triple holiday of Tres de Mayo (the Dominator's ceremonial birthday), Kentucky Derby Day, and Free Comic Book Day. The Domination of Eiler holiday observance started last night, on the Dominator's chronological birthday as adjusted for the Pacific time zone. It has already created an online media sensation, at least among its elite class of followers. Tomorrow, the world.

All Hail the Domination!

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