Travelog of Southwest Wisconsin, 2005

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Domination of Eiler Journal #8: Operation Darkflower III

What Is the Domination of Eiler?

In one sense, "The Domination of Eiler" is a political entity modeled upon the Holy Roman Empire. Which is to say, it works through national and local political entities, but transcends nation-state boundaries. You may already be a citizen without knowing it!

In another sense, "The Domination of Eiler" is a pen name for an amateur but very prolific web journalist. Perhaps you may enjoy these travel writings, given this simple guide:

  • The Domination of Eiler is led by, of course, the Dominator.
  • Its chief military force, and bodyguard of the Dominator, is the Domination Guard.
  • The Domination's world headquarters is in Scumburg-Illinois, near Chicago. As such, Wisconsin is a frequent target for Domination patrols.
  • The Domination of Eiler is continuing its series of short-range offensives into Wisconsin. Operations Waka Pig, Darkflower I, and Freebooter have extended the Domination's frontline throughout southeastern Wisconsin. Next, southwestern Wisconsin submits!

    But first, the Eiler Doctrine will be invoked in Madison, Wisconsin for the Thanksgiving holiday.

    Due to similarities with last year's Thanksgiving offensives Darkflower I and II, this operation has been designated Darkflower III.

    Coincidentally, it comes to the Domination's attention that the Xmas anthem "White Christmas" has thus far escaped rewriting to become a Domination patriotic song. This deplorable situation is hereby rectified, in a manner which makes it the official music for this operation.

    "I'm dreaming of a dark flower,
    This time of year it always blooms,
    Bringing Domination throughout the nation,
    To spread its might throughout the gloom..."

    Operational Map

    Day 0: Wednesday 23 November 2005

    For early stages of the operation, the Domination is reinforcing its control of previously-patrolled areas.

    Domination forces therefore chose not to penetrate to Madison. Instead, the forces bivouaced in the previously-occupied town of Janesville, at about 6:30 pm.

    Local sources indicate, General Motors hasn't decided whether to close its local plant as part of its upcoming national wave of plant closures. One local says, it could get interesting.

    Day 1: Thursday 24 November 2005
    Thanksgiving Day

    Troops moved out in excellent order, and advanced into Madison via back road U.S. 14, largely just for the pleasure of bringing the Domination of Eiler to Evansville-Wisconsin and the surrounding dairylands. (Operational music "The Quarterdrawing of the Dog".)

    Afternoon allocated for Eiler Doctrine intervention. High winds and chill prevent a bike ride, but a nice walk there and back is still feasible. Everyone should get a walk after Thanksgiving dinner.

    Mission successful, or at least the associate-Eilers didn't swear vengeance within the Dominator's earshot. And this part of the Eiler clan has more than one quirky artist-painter, so a few extra personally-designed machine-crafted flag-shaped bits of smiley-face artwork (a.k.a. the Domination Battle Flag) blended right in.

    Evening allocated for relaxation at Great Dane Brewpub, with the Dominator's loved ones. No, not his relatives, his loved ones. That is to say, comic books, web pages (particularly this one, citizen), and pumpkin ale.

    Day 2: Friday 25 November 2005
    The Dreaded Day After Thanksgiving

    While the Domination of Eiler troopers slept, the barracks filled up with children and their handlers. Breakfast was mobbed, but congenial under the circumstances. Among other things, a fresh waffle was conquered.

    The dreaded mall has been bypassed, by the simple expedient of buying a storage card at a nearby Walgreens drugstore. Even the crappy photo cards that drugstores sell nowadays, will do the job. They can store 1800 Domination web-grade pictures, or 600 if the Domination's photographer finally turns up the quality. In comparison, the Domination's six-year-old photo card only stored one tenth the pictures. Gotta love that 2005 tech.

    Snow is moving into the area from the west. The Domination of Eiler is meeting the challenge head-on, and contining its drive toward the west. Domination forces moved out in excellent order around 10:30 am, striking toward the Wisconsin River.

    Given the Domination's previous experience invading Wisconsin, it was no surprise that 90% of attractions were closed this time of year. The invasion force concentrated on the remaining 10%.

    Snow vs. House on the Rock

    By this time, the snow was becoming contentious. Forces could have pressed on to Mississippi River points Dubuque or Prairie du Chien in another 90 minutes or so - but weren't sure what the purpose would be, other to sleep in a cheap chain hotel.

    Instead, the Domination followed local intelligence reports to find the Brewery Creek Inn, a brewpub-inn in Mineral Point, Wisconsin. Lodgings were obtained, not cheap, but quality. Lunch was also obtained, cheap.

    Snowy Town

    Mineral Point claims to be Wisconsin's first territorial capital. The Gov didn't leave behind any ostentatious domes as in Madison, but Mineral Point has a main street ("High Street") filled with cute shops that sell art and antiques, very scenic when snow is falling. These were all bypassed, but several more meaningful places submitted to the Domination of Eiler:

    Day 3: Saturday 26 November 2005

    Domination morning of rest, but afternoon of resurgence, thanks no doubt to the healing power of ice water and mineral spirits the night before.

    Before the forces left town, they subdued the Mineral Point Railway Museum.

    Troops then deployed eastward to Mount Horeb (with operational music "New York Mining Disaster 1941"), where several points submitted to the Domination of Eiler. Local museums were unexpectedly open! But first...

    Domination forces then swung south, and advanced rapidly on back roads toward New Glarus and Monroe. Both these towns are home to Swiss-American people and large breweries. However, New Glarus's brewery is closed on Saturdays, and the town offered little otherwise, at least outside tourist season. Monroe was therefore chosen for garrison.

    Day 4: Sunday 27 November 2005

    Thanks to eastward and southward deployment on Saturday, Domination forces are now nicely situated for rapid return to the District of Dominance - without braving the dreaded South Beloit-Illinois toll plaza.

    And so, the Domination forces have once again surprised the coalition partners at its regular church, by showing up for Kingdom-of-Heaven obeisance on a vacation day. This has now been accomplished from each of four states that border Lake Michigan.

    Ribbon of Domination

    Overall, this operation shows almost all the signs of success:

    Still, Domination of Eiler forces return triumphant, all praise to the One Maker.

    (signed) Dominator S. Eiler, Fist of the One Maker, for the Domination of Eiler.

    The Domination of Eiler believes in free sharing of information. But if you wish to reproduce significant parts of the commentary within, or the photos (which are what everyone seems to want to see), be aware that they are © copyright 2007 by Eiler Technical Enterprises. And have a niiiice daay.