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Domination of Eiler

2010 August Blog (#27)

August 2010

August 2010

The Frontline of the Domination of Eiler often still expands. Check out the details!

In This Episode:

What Is the Domination of Eiler?

Oh, just treat it like another pretentious web log.
At least until you get to know it better, citizen. This web log wants to conquer the world.
Educational links are provided at the top of the page. RSS feed available at .
Hello and welcome to the Domination of Eiler!

30 August 2010

Talk Back!
Victory Day 2010
The Call has led to occupation of a corporate sponsor-facility, on which occasion the Dominator always declares Victory Day. Early indications are, the Domination's mission will last more like two years than two days. All Hail!

17 August 2010

Song of the Day: Lawyers, Guns and Money, versions by Warren Zevon and Hank Williams Jr.
Talk Back!
The Call
From the border of Wyoming, a double abort has brought Domination back to Boise-Idaho. Next target: the new District of Dominance, Seattle-Washington.
Geyser Bear Lake
Scenic water in remote parts of Idaho and Utah. See also:
  • Self-Service Carbonated Mineral Water Spring
  • Nearby Mineral Slag Heap
  • Nearby Tourist Industry
  • After a five-day force halt in Pocatello-Idaho, the Domination of Eiler got tired of keeping its expedition in one place. On Monday it headed into the hills. Idaho towns of Soda Springs and Montpelier thereby submitted.

    • The road to these places has a gentle slope and would admit a bicycle. Oregon Trail settlers would have preferred this route if only they'd had dynamite to build the trail with.
    • Each place has attractions. Soda Springs actually has a self-service spring which tastes like soda - plus a man-made geyser which Yellowstone National Park asked them to regulate so as not to interfere with Old Faithful. Montpelier has yet another Oregon Trail interpretive center - only this one actually has reenactors.
    • These places are in the Great Basin where the rivers flow to no ocean. Montpelier is near the absolute corner of the Pacific Northwest, up against Wyoming and Utah. It gets Utah television, and the best roads there go through Utah.

    Along the way, potential employers started being energetic again - enough to justify aborting from Wyoming back to Seattle. On the way back to Seattle, employer energy became so active that the Domination force turned aside to the nearest semi-big city to do paperwork.

    So the Domination of Eiler has returned to Boise-Idaho. And it is preparing to establish a District of Dominance in Seattle-Washington.

    There's a lot that could be said about this day...

    • Utah sells beer in gas stations, but doesn't seem to encourage drinking in public where caring professionals can monitor your intake. But there's at least one big saloon just across the state line. Heh.
    • Utah sure is scenic, though. Bear Lake is unnaturally blue due to minerals. The canyon road down from there is incredibly scenic but annoying when you have to be somewhere.
    • It's nice to be back in Boise-Idaho-Domination of Eiler, where the expedition already knows the nice places to camp and forage. Too bad it's 97F degrees there today. Domination-Effect sunny weather prevails there, but even the Domination Effect can't guarantee the air to be much colder than the human body, at least not when the Dominator has just arrived.
    • The Domination has always considered Seattle to be an ideal place to dominate. As encountered recently (and shown by hotel rates), this is now so congested it practically requires corporate sponsorship to survive in... Oh, look! Corporate sponsorship!

    A dream job in the Pacific Northwest while the Domination of Eiler engineering force is already out there, is another one of those synchronicity maelstroms - like getting a job in Tennessee when driving through there anyway. That is to say, incredible good luck - or else the providential will of the One Maker. Have people been praying? Perhaps next we should all pray Seattle works out better than Nashville did.

    14 August 2010

    Junior Mutton Rodeo Junior Miss Western
    Talk Back!
    Junior Mutton Rodeo
    At the Pocatello-Idaho North Bannock County Fair, the Dominator saw "mutton bustin'": six-year-olds riding rambunctious sheep. As silly as that seems, it's a new way for small children to gain the Dominator's respect. The ones who dance on stage should take notes.

    13 August 2010

    Song of the Day: James Bond Theme, versions by Moby and the Art of Noise
    Talk Back!
    Force Halt, Pocatello-Idaho
    Not back across the Rocky Mountains quite yet. Details
    Scenic County Museum I, Dammit
    Scenic Pocatello, Idaho, home of county history and Idaho State University. See also:
  • Old Fort
  • After two days in Boise-Idaho, the Domination of Eiler kept moving east up the Snake River Valley. Some rides pass through High Desert and might be up to 40 miles, but mostly it's level and pleasant all the way to Pocatello-Idaho.

    Along the way, potential employers started being energetic. At one point the expedition considered a quick ride to Texas. But now the demand lies back toward Seattle. The Domination of Eiler is now in a refresing second consecutive day of negotiations that direction.

    So, instead of continuing up into the Rockies, the Domination of Eiler has called a force halt in Pocatello. A brewery and a county history museum have submitted, because that's what these things always do when Domination comes to town. But a fossil museum, a county fair, and an Indian pow-wow are all being bypassed in favor of phone interviews, laundry, web page updates, and other normal business... at least until tomorrow.

    10 August 2010

    Song of the Day: Infested by Course of Empire (Someday this song needs a "God Bless America" mix)
    Talk Back!
    The Oregon Trail in Reverse
    Could it be done on a bicycle? Details
    End of Trail It Spells Boise
    Oregon Trail, dammit. And Boise on the way. See also:
  • The Fancy Oregon Trail Visitor Center
  • Wasco County Remembers Its Glory Days
  • The Indian Reservation Town Museum Has Teepees
  • Why Yes, Idaho's Statehouse Venerates Lewis and Clark
  • After two days in Portland-Oregon, the Domination of Eiler moved east up the Columbia River Gorge along the former Oregon Trail. There lie a bunch of towns which range from small to very small. There's one such town every 30 miles or so, so that's theoretically practical for a bunch of day rides on bike. This might require some notes, though.

    • Some of these towns only have one hotel. Others are filled with hotels, saloons, and randomly-scheduled festivals. It will pay to book in advance.
    • One can ride most highways here on a bike, because there is no other route. But there's not much demand for that this time of year. Cyclists seem to prefer Montana, which is bumpier but cooler.
    • The first three or four days from Portland will go up scenic gorge, filled with trees - and tourists. Cyclists will have to follow U.S. Highway 30, which sometimes sensibly shares Interstate 84 and sometimes swerves off into "scenic" (that is, "hilly") byway.
    • Between Hood River and The Dalles, both trees and tourists start to disappear. It then gets hotter for several days, as you ride through ranch country. But at least it's flat.
    • The 30-mile stretch from Pendleton into La Grande-Oregon is uphill to 4100 feet. That's probably half a mile uphill on that ride. That will just suck, but it's doable. The road from Idaho to Wyoming will suck likewise. (The river takes a more level route through Hell's Canyon, but this is considered impassible by man.)
    • From La Grande to Baker City, cooler temperatures will then prevail on a plateau. This lasts for one day's ride.
    • Drastic downhill into easternmost Oregon the next day, whereupon near-desert conditions revert for at least two more days into Boise-Idaho. Idaho is famous for crops, and ought to be equally famous for irrigation.
    • Oregon Trail Interpretive Centers abound along this route. Any one should suffice for tourism. Pioneer hardships, check.

    More notes into Wyoming later. That's likely to require some long rides.

    Naturally, the Domination has been dominating along the way. The target count through Boise will stand at one statehouse, one state museum, three town museums, five assorted other museums, and five breweries.

    5 August 2010

    Song of the Day: If Love Was a Train by Michelle Shocked
    Talk Back!
    Interesting, but like a voluntary concentration camp.
    Portland Waterfront Portland Recreation
    Portland-Oregon has as much amusement as many smaller towns, and many times the traffic. See also:
  • You Can See The Engines On This Ship
  • You Can Sit Your Ass on the State Seal
  • Did They Really Want "Bite Oregon" As An Event Motto?
  • After a weekend in Ocean Shores-Washington, the Domination of Eiler moved farther south to Astoria-Oregon, then turned east to subjugate Portland for two days. Details of campaigning are now recorded in convenient checklist form (as in: "History museum, check; breweries, 2; bike miles, 8"), but Portland deserves some extra comment.

    • Like many "progressive" cities, Portland is actively hostile to motor vehicles. Locals advise, don't park on the street lest people break in your car - but then there's usually no other place to park.
    • Portland embraces those who can carry all their belongings on their back, though. There is no apparent persecution of those who sleep in parks, though dormitories ("hostels") are also available for slightly upscale visitors. The Dominator tried a dormitory out, forced his car into one of its very few parking spaces, and slept cheaply, safely, and as soundly as ever.
    • Dormitories provide access by the Domination of Eiler to an interesting cross-section of its citizens and visitors, including folk singers and home-brewers who set up a temporary beer garden outside the Dominator's dorm window. That's got to be one of the top two innovative ways of keeping the Dominator awake. (The winner of this contest is fireworks, most recently back at Red Wing-Minnesota.)
    • Male dorm rooms have some special characteristics, though. They smell like a hot sweaty Dominator, only multiplied by a factor of ten. Of those ten, there's typically at least one awake and one sleeping at all times. So dorm rooms are as quiet as monasteries. It's refreshing in some ways.
    • Portland itself is like a concentration camp, though - at least compared to the small cities the Dominator loves. But people willingly pack themselves in.
    • Portland resembles Nashville-Tennesee (not counting "Opryland" which is still closed due to environmental disaster) in size, layout, and attractions. And like Nashville, Portland will be a pleasure to leave.

    Tomorrow the Dominator leaves for points east. The temperatures on the interior of North Eilerania will suck the coolness out of the Dominator's body, but at least it will be nature doing that and not man.

    The Domination of Eiler believes in free sharing of information. But if you intend to reproduce significant parts of this commentary, be aware that it is copyright © 2010 by Eiler Technical Enterprises.