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Domination of Eiler

2010 Instant Summer Blog (#23)

May - April 2010

In This Episode:

What Is the Domination of Eiler?

Oh, just treat it like another pretentious web log.
At least until you get to know it better, citizen. This web log wants to conquer the world.
Educational links are provided at the top of the page. RSS feed available at .
Hello and welcome to the Domination of Eiler!

31 May 2010

Song of the Day: Chilly Winds, by the Osmonds
Talk Back!
Post-Vacation Recovery Vacation
Upstate New York submits in the Dominator's spare time.
St. Lawrenct Seaway Old Fort Niagara
The Welland Canal, the part of the St. Lawrence Seaway that lets freighters not go over Niagara Falls. Near St. Catharines, Ontario.
Old Fort Niagara, a scenic pointy bit of New York State.
Big Flag, Before Big Flag, After
Waterloo-New York claims to be the home of the real Memorial Day, but they spent Memorial Day packing their flags. See also:
  • Waterloo's Memorial Day Museum - Not Open Memorial Day
  • Biker Rally on Memorial Day
  • People Supposedly Still Use The Erie Canal, But Who Knows How?
  • Guest Re-Enactors at Old Fort Niagara, Complete With Machine Guns
  • In the Domination of Eiler, it is customary to take a vacation to recover from vacation. The conquest of Brantford-Ontario required such a recovery.

    Of course, even the recovery was conqueriffic. The Welland Canals Center of the St. Lawrence Seaway and Old Fort Niagara both submitted. So did a radio broadcast of the Indy 500 on Buffalo-New York AM sports radio, and a Motel 6 and an Applebees restaurant near the Erie Canal and an industrial park near Rochester-New York. The Motel 6 was the most restful part of vacation.

    Today, the Domination's expedition spent an extra day avoiding traffic so as to not fight every New Yorker who loves the Finger Lakes. Paradoxically this meant subjugating some of the Finger Lakes as New Yorkers retreated from there. The Domination has already garrisoned Hammondsport and Geneva, but today some new targets submit.

    • Waterloo-New York is so proud to be the origin of Memorial Day, it has a Memorial Day museum, open 10 am Monday - Saturday throughout the summer... except Memorial Day. People of Waterloo swore the museum would open later that day, after they cleaned up the flags from Memorial Day Plaza where they had their celebration yesterday. The town was therefore pleasantly accessible, but there were some disappointed tourists... This town might have to go on the Silly Places List.
    • Auburn-New York has historic houses for William Seward and Harriet Tubman. But it also was clogged by an actual parade for Memorial Day, which probably precludes the regular museum hours. This was all bypassed as best as possible, given that the parade claimed the street that goes from Waterloo to the next target, Skaneateles.
    • Skaneateles-New York had business as usual, aside from some extra tourists. Ambiance is much like Lake Geneva-Wisconsin, only Wisconsin has fewer cute shops and more bars. Barracks was nonetheless established at Birds Nest Motel: quite nice and was recommended by associate Eilers. Food and beverage came from Sherwood Inn, the only bar (and fancy and fairly cheap if you order the right beer), and from Doug's Fish Fry, where you stand in line to order but at least they serve good local draft beer.

    29 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Carefree Highway, by Gordon Lightfoot
    Talk Back!
    Attack! Down the Wayne Gretsky Parkway!
    A Dark Day is Coming A Dark Day is Here
    Brantford-Ontario is "renewing" its downtown, and not everyone likes that.
    Here's What Comes In Here's What Brantford Still Has
    Brantford is renovating around a new casino. But the locals still thrive down the side streets. See also:
  • Canada's War Casualties, Including the Gulf War
  • Hey, Kids! Self-Guided Log Village Tour!
  • First Anglican Chapel in Ontario, Buiilt for the Iroquois
  • This is the Alexander Graham Bell Homestead, Never Mind What Nova Scotia Says
  • Yeah, Brantford Has History Too
  • Yesterday's offensive has come down to street fighting. Brantford-Ontario has so many traditional tourist targets to subjugate, this day was a blitzkrieg.

    • The Canadian Military Heritage Museum Brantford has memorabilia, plus some history of Canada's early wars that at least match the official military museum in Ottawa from 1783 on. Open from 10 am most days.
    • The Kanata Historical Village is always open and has a self-guided tour of a recreated Iroquois stockade. Parents beware, your kids will be climbing up every stockade! But the Domination of Eiler respects any tour venue that isn't idiot-proof. Free admission.
    • Her Majesty's Royal Chapel of the Mohawks dates back to King George III in 1785 (or Queen Anne in 1712, depending on how you count), and is the oldest Protestant church in Ontario. They still have services 11 am Sundays in July and August. Tourists can come in and look Wednesday through Sunday 1:00 - 5:30 May through October, and practically all the time July and August. Free admission.
    • The Alexander Graham Bell Homestead has standard historic home stuff, plus some old phones. (The 1950s model looked like the Dominator's first 1980s phone.) Tuesday - Sunday, 9:30 am - 4:30 pm. $5 admission.
    • The Brant Museum has standard local history, only not covering Ice Age or Stone Age. How sensible. Open 10 am - 4 pm Wednesday - Saturday, and only from 1 pm on Saturdays. Free admission.

    All targets were subdued by bicycle assault. Brantford is proud of its bike paths. These are still a work in progress but are quite usable, at least by mountain bikes. But read the local trail maps carefully; they have pure hiking trails marked too.

    The true mark of the Domination of Eiler is, it sinks below the surface, where the locals go.

    • Downtown Brantford is a demolition zone, so as to not trouble the local casino with any sort of historic downtown area to suck away tourists. Brando's Pub hid up a side street, and therefore still operates. Indeed, it's the local memorial center for a Canadian Forces trooper who died in Afghanistan. He worked at this bar! His banner now bears an Eiler signature.
    • Three Web search sites could not find a Saturday night church service in this city. Our Lady of the Assumption Catholic Church had one, 5 pm. The Dominator came in dirty, sweaty, Protestant, and unworthy to enter a tabernacle of Holy God, but the priest still blessed him. All praise to the One Maker.

    Even this short occupation of Canada makes one thing obvious. Invading Canada is costly nowadays. Restaurant prices are about 30% above United States, and alcohol is 50% above. It always was, but the exchange rates just suck now. This probably means, no assault on Alaska this year.

    Brantford is especially expensive. It has cheap hotels due east of the center of town, but its Visitor Center only advertises hotels which charge 3% extra on top of their already expensive rates to subsidize the Visitor Center. Tomorrow the Domination plans to leave town and roll past Niagara, to live more cheaply and see what's fun near Rochester-New York.

    28 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Canadian Railroad Trilogy, by Gordon Lightfoot
    Talk Back!
    On the Road Again
    Well, that was fast.
    THE Circumcision
    Of course Jesus was circumcised, and some people actually commemorate it. From a museum in Woodstock-Ontario. See also:
  • The Last Judgment, in Icon Form
  • Toilet Humor in Another Canadian Museum
  • Some Extra Effort to Make This Mannequin a Boy Soldier
  • Family Crest; The Black Crows Stand for Death
  • The latest employment is done. After great effort, the Domination's mercenary engineering force compelled a web provider to fix a customer situation on a crappy system. But in the meantime, the customer wisely decided to upgrade. Oops, there went the budget for mercenaries. Oh well, that's the life of a mercenary.

    Two of the Domination's allies in New England coincidentally found out first. Both offered sanctuary. The Domination's permanent expeditionary force accepted both offers. And so begins the long-awaited Domination Goodwill Tour of the continent of North Eilerania.

    Flint-Michigan is convenient to highways in five directions, including east to New England. But the nation-state of Canada puts up barricades to regulate travel in between. The Domination decided to brave the Sarnia barricade. Fortunately today's crossing was trivial. Canada's main concern was, if your car breaks down here, can you afford to fix it?

    About halfway to the next barricade, in Woodstock-Ontario, the expedition took a rest stop at a tourist info booth, run by Oxford County. They made a convincing case for subjugation of several local attractions, mostly historical museums.

    • The Woodstock Peace Lighthouse submitted about one hundred icon-style paintings of the life of Jesus, complete with little-known details like his circumcision. Daily 1 to 5 pm, or as early as 11 am May through September.
    • The Woodstock Museum submitted local history, including an explanation for the Upper Canada rebellion that nobody in the U.S. ever hears about, plus an exhibit on toilets through the ages. Tuesday - Saturday, 10 am - 5 pm, plus Mondays now that it's summer in Canada.
    • Down the road in Princeton, the Princeton and District Museum submitted local history. They're really inventive with mannequins. And the staff was really surprised that someone would come there from Chicago.
    • The Myrtleville House Museum in Brantford submitted a history house with four generations of famous-local-citizen content. (Irish immigrant farmers in this case. With black crows on their family crest, signifying death.) Open Monday - Friday, 9 am - 4 pm, plus weekend afternoons once summer really comes in July.

    All these museums are free! Or donation-only, anyway. Unfortunately, after the first few museums, for any donation less than $20, donation money of the right amount always runs out. Oh well.

    The day's offensive ended at Brantford-Ontario. Barracks at Days Inn; dinner at Kelsey's, apparently a Canadian Applebees. Both expensive. (Be careful when ordering beer at Kelsey's; anything more impressive than Molson counts as "premium", and when the menu says "$3.99 and up" for premium, it means $6.45!) Canadian dollars are within 5% of U.S. dollars nowadays. Maybe U.S. currency is strong compared to Europe now, but Canada isn't bowing down any more.

    Brantford has quite a few more museums. Another day has been allocated to subjugate them. But that'll have to be it. Hotels are expensive here too, at least when Americans consider it a holiday weekend.

    25 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Brazil, by Heretix
    Talk Back!
    Going to Ground
    Oh, why not Flint-Michigan?
    You Can Actually Sit In It
    Flint-Michigan has so many antique cars, they'll actually let you sit in one of them.

    Today's mission day started in Frankenmuth-Michigan, with no objective. The weather offers no benefit to going north today; Traverse City will be hotter than Nashville. And all known potential employers would prefer south. From Frankenmuth, that means Flint.

    Flint has an entirely decent historical museum ("Sloan Museum"). It skips the Ice Age and the First Nations, and goes directly to pioneers and carriages. Then it spends a lot of display space on the horseless carriage, which the Flint-based company "General Motors" is famous for.

    While the expedition was subjugating a garage full of historic horseless carriages of Flint-Michigan manufacture, a recruiter called and offered a work-from-anywhere job interview via phone, three hours later. The expeditionary force promptly used a book of discount hotel coupons to find the cheapest hotel in Flint near the highway and with Internet service. The interview went so well, the Domination of Eiler was hired on the spot. A cyber-offensive began that same hour, from the Flint hotel room. The Domination of Eiler works fast, and respects employers who work fast too.

    So, it looks like the Domination of Eiler will be going to ground in Flint-Michigan, at least until the sponsor's current crisis is averted. At least there will be fewer people, not more, around the hotel room for the upcoming Race Day weekend. And the neighborhood pub is a Hooters.

    Coincidentally, today is the Domination holiday of Day of Glory, commemorating the day the Domination of Eiler abandoned corporate salary slavery. A paid mercenary job is not slavery, though.

    The Day of Glory is typically observed with a major lifestyle change. This already happened, earlier this month when the Dominator went solo and mobile. All praise to the One Maker, for giving a sign that the Domination's new mobile lifestyle can work.

    24 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Born in the USA, by Bruce Springsteen
    Talk Back!
    Frankenmuth-Michigan (and Bay City)
    At least they're both open Mondays.
    The Brewery The Surprising Local Export
    Of course they have a brewery in Frankenmuth, but the main export is actually for baking. See also:
  • The CHRISTmas Wonderland Store, Making Some Bucks Off The Name
  • Michigan in Siberia, from the Military Museum
  • Michigan in Space
  • The Domination of Eiler retreated from "The Thumb" today, having subjugated it. This being a Monday morning before tourist season, there was almost no opposition on the roads - and no reason to stop. Restaurants are mostly closed except for weekends.

    Bay City stood on the retreat route. Its historical museum (largely about loggers and saloons, with free admission), a local steakhouse, and some drugstores teamed up in a heroic attempt to stop the retreat. Today's Battle of Bay City lasted about 2.5 hours, but the expeditionary force was leaving town before 2 pm.

    The next target was Frankenmuth, "Michigan's Little Bavaria". It is mostly famous for CHRISTmas (not Christmas or Xmas) ornaments, but it also has museums and a brewery. Its ambiance is much like the Wisconsin Dells, only Frankenmuth has fewer cheap hotels and no waterparks.

    • The Frankenmuth Historical Museum submitted town history for $2. German Lutherans came here from Franconia to be a good influence on Indians. ("Franken" = "of Franconia".) Other Germans came here because the other options were "Be an apprentice" or "Join the army". Exhibits include some Laotian history (because Frankenmuth likes all its immigrants) and a polka version of the Mickey Mouse Song where they also spell out "FRA,NKE,NMUTH".
    • Frankenmuth has a paddlewheel riverboat, which costs $9 and takes an hour to go slightly farther than a bike can go in 20 minutes. This was bypassed. However, Frankenmuth is somewhat hostile to bicycles. It has one bike path, conveniently down a side street where tourists never go. Along the main drag, bikes either duck through parking lots or share four lanes with cars.
    • The Frankenmuth Brewery submitted a sampler of six good-sized beers for $4.5. It must have been Happy Hour. But its dinner menu was like any American brewpub, so the expedition moved on to find German-style dinner.
    • The town is famous for family-style chicken dinner, sold at three different places owned by the same company. The Domination of Eiler had its dinner at Lorelei's Lounge in the Frankenmuth Inn Lodge, where they offer bar seating and dinners for $13 instead of $20. Frankenmuth is not cheap.
    • The Dominator had given up on cheap dessert. But then he found Sullivan's Black Forest Brew Haus and Grill hiding down the same side road as his mid-price hotel. Secret brew pub!
    • Frankenmuth also has Michigan's Own Military and Space Museum, down that same side road. This promises about half an hour of local famous person fun tomorrow. (Each one a soldier, and their memorabilia got donated personally to the curator. And this collection goes back to the Spanish-American War.) By tomorrow, employers better be calling, or the expedition will be heading north to avoid the heat.

    22 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Big Hotel (yeah, right), by Big Pig
    Talk Back!
    The Tip of the Thumb
    The Domination of Eiler sinks in at a Michigan land's end.
    Cabin and Grindstones President Garfield Got Drunk Here
    They really do decorate with grindstones at Grindstone City. And President Garfield used to get drunk nearby. See also:
    Map of the Thumb Tip
    A Grindstone To Remember Pioneers By

    The Domination of Eiler is now subjugating the tip of the Michigan Lower Peninsula "Thumb". It's taken up quarters in a cabin in Grindstone City and gone to Friday night fish fry, to do it up right. This Saturday, the local big city of Port Austin submits to a ten-mile bike ride, which is like a regular Domination bike patrol back in Illinois.

    Grindstone City really is famous for grindstones. They're lying around all over the place. It shows up on Michigan maps as a Historic Site. There's a historical marker hidden in a trailer park, which explains all: Grindstone City used to make grindstones for sharpening knives. After World War 1, synthetic materials worked better for that. So the industry collapsed in 1934, everyone moved away, and there were enough grindstones left over for landscaping.

    Port Austin is scenic but boring, at least until most of the bars open at 5 pm - and weekends only. But at least it actually has both hotels and bars. In most of the towns on the way here, the Domination force would drive to the center of town, do some laps around side streets, and find some scenic views and not much else.

    Tomorrow has been set aside as Day of Rest, so as to go to church and not cut into travel time. Choices are Catholic and "Unified Protestant", both in Port Austin. Apparently the Protestants share a minister with some other town, because their church starts at 9:15 am. Looks like the Dominator's going to Mass.

    Back at Grindstone City, the cabin has two local pubs: Zeb's and Captain Morgan's. They will both warn you that their large drafts are 33 ounces, as is Michigan custom. The proper response is either, "It's not like I'm driving anywhere" or "You're not scaring me yet."

    For phone service, one goes to the end of the pier. For Internet access, one either goes to Zeb's or sits outside the landlord's back door at Captain Morgan's. So far, this is more than keeping up with the desire of potential employers to contact the Domination's mercenary engineering force.

    The lakeshore is at least ten degrees colder than the rest of Lower Michigan. Good thing, too; the temperature's supposed to be 85 degrees in a few days. People are whining about cold and fog here, but this is the Domination's kind of summer weather.

    In short, it's a lovely vacation, and has potential as a lifestyle. Though the locals say, things start to get crazy here on Memorial Day / Race Day weekend.

    20 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Behind the Sun, by Eric Clapton
    Talk Back!
    "The Thumb" begins to submit.
    Fine Lodging What? Sunrise?
    A refreshingly cold beach resort at affordable prices.

    Since the last entry, in which the Domination of Eiler garrisoned Fond du Lac-Wisconsin, stuff has happened.

    • The potential employer in Waukegan-Illinois has said, we have a job for you, but it's in Ohio. The Waukegan Offensive is therefore officially over, with less than success. And now they're delaying the Ohio job.
    • In response, the Dominator took shelter among associate-Eilers in Kalamazoo-Michigan for several days. Now the Domination of Eiler is breaking out from refuge, and contemplating its long-awaited continental goodwill tour.
    • Meanwhile, the Dominator's alphabetical tour through one-third of his music collection finally made it from A to B.

    Weather patterns are bringing 80-degree temperatures throughout lower Michigan. The shores of Lake Huron have therefore been expediently chosen for Domination, since it's ten degrees cooler there. The Domination's expeditionary force drove to the previously-conquered town of Port Huron, then turned left to finally subjugate the Huron lakeshore.

    Port Huron's northern outskirts are full of chain restaurants, but not with hotels nearby. The expedition therefore drove up the Huron shore to the next town with motels: Lexington-Michigan.

    • Smackwater Jack's submitted beer and pizza for dinner. It's part of an entertainment complex which has concerts by Gordon Lightfoot, The Tubes, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, and any number of other respectable groups who enjoy a trip to Lake Huron to recover from their glory days. Plus lots of cover bands.
    • The Cadillac House submitted beer and pie for dessert. It had a better ambiance than the pub across the street, because that pub hasn't scared the children off. But when someone asked "When's Happy Hour?", people just laughed.
    • The White Feather Motel submitted cheap barracks and a private beach - plus the ambiance of a trailer park, because it is one. Probably no Wi-Fi, though. And bring cash; credit cards not accepted. And even the cell phone is quesionable here.

    Next, of course, the rest of The Thumb submits in a leisurely manner, and probably Frankenmuth too. After that, the Domination of Eiler can strike at either Ohio, northern Wisconsin, southern Ontario, or even New England from here. From half of those places Alaska can finally submit in straightforward manner.

    8 May 2010

    Three Songs of the Day all named America, by Laibach, Santana, and Spinal Tap
    Talk Back!
    Fond du Lac-Wisconsin
    Any place may submit to the Domination, especially in Wisconsin.
    This Village is Closed This Lighthouse is Open After All The Puppets Are On
    The village was closed, but the lighthouse was open after all, and puppets gave the sermon at church that weekend.

    Illinois employers don't want to talk until at least Monday. Illinois hotels are raising their rates for the weekend. So the Domination of Eiler is getting a taste of the aimless expeditionary life. This is practice for being retired.

    The expeditionary force moved out in excellent order from the Illinois Beach Resort, toward Wisconsin where hotels are likely to be cheaper and not ovrcrowded. It's snowing in Wisconsin this morning. Admittedly this is far to the north and only at night, but it's probably scaring off tourists anyway.

    Despite heavy opposition from road construction, a Wisconsin road map was conquered at the I-94 welcome center. (Domination of Eiler map readiness has suffered lately. Its US road atlas is with the Consort in Florida, and the Wisconsin atlas is in storage.)

    With map finally in hand, Stevens Point-Wisconsin was chosen as a destination to easily conquer beyond the Domination's Frontline. However, there is no urgent reason to go there on a somewhat nasty early-spring day. So the Domination's expeditionary force stopped halfway for the day, at Fond du Lac-Wisconsin.

    • Fond du Lac is on an inland lake. Its town lighthouse resisted Domination. It has signs saying it's open eight hours every day, but the lighthouse door was locked. The Dominator was hoping this might be one of his continent's very few self-guided lighthouse tours. Oh well.
    • Downtown has a Roaring Twenties-era hotel (now a Ramada) and a swarm of restaurants. Its own restaurant has nice food, nice beer, and discount coupons for hotel patrons. Before that, the Firehouse Bar and Grill submitted salad and a sampler of obscure microbrews.
    • There's a historic village toward the edge of town. Today wasn't a good day to ride the bike to see it, but tomorrow should be fine. Oh, let's go to church too, make a day of it, and spend another night.
    • Tomorrow the local Methodists are having a puppet show for their service. Methodists do this more often than one might think; in Rolling Meadows-Illinois their puppet team even does road maintenance on Dundee Road. (With or without the puppets?)

    Some people may wonder if the Dominator's grown old and bitter, now that he's homeless and unemployed and his wedding's fallen through. Well, maybe. But people who can still afford to flit off to lakeside hotels and have fine dinners should rightfully be thankful, not bitter. So let it be in the Domination of Eiler.

    7 May 2010

    Song of the Day: Alas For You, Godspell
    Talk Back!
    Song of the Day
    Because everyone cares what everyone else is listening to.

    It's become stylish to announce your music tastes on Facebook. The Domination of Eiler now embraces this trend.

    Some people organize their music in their heads, and share the first song that goes through their heads in the morning. But in the Domination of Eiler there's a Conquering Cell Phone to organize and play the collection. It's now spent three days starting to go through the collection A to Z... well, actually 1 (one) to Z, because 1 comes before A.

    In the Domination, the best song gets mentioned, not the first. So here's the best for each day.

    1. Wednesday 5 May: "16 Candles", by Danielle Dax. "On every side stank the stiff blue dead..."
    2. Thursday 6 May: "A Time for Fear", by the Art of Noise. Announcements about the 1984 invasion of Grenada, put to music.
    3. Friday 7 May: "Alas For You", from the Godspell stage play soundtrack, with... "Sons of the dogs who murdered the prophets, you finish the work that your fathers began..."

    These things should be obvious:

    • The Domination of Eiler has eclectic tastes, but it always likes happy music.
    • It might take a while to get through the 3600 songs in this batch. Good thing. After this batch, there are only two more batches to play before starting over.

    Other people have other tastes, of course. In water aerobics class today, the teacher played a Time-Life Golden Oldies compilation or something, full of music the Dominator's mom used to like. The Dominator actually enjoyed it. But when his own generation gets its own Golden Oldies soundtrack, it'll have "Another Brick in the Wall". This really was the anthem as the Dominator's generation tore down the Berlin Wall.

    6 May 2010

    Talk Back!
    Invasion Zone Waukegan
    The Domination of Eiler sinks in, at least for a week.

    The Domination of Eiler is both unemployed and homeless now. But it's been planning for this situation for over a decade. The operational plan to live in various hotel rooms has gone into effect. And at least this week, Waukegan-Illinois submits. In its copious spare time, the Domination has invaded downtown Waukegan from both west and north, the only real way: by bicycle.

    • The local historical society has finally submitted... a lot of Victorian furniture, plus some Waukegan history. "Waukegan" = "Little Fort" in the local Indian language. The famous local citizens are Ray Bradbury and Jack Benny. And apparently the Worcester-Massachusetts connection is lost to them. (The Washington-Moen wire company helped found Waukegan's industry in the 1890s, shortly after the railroad finally arrived there.)
    • The downtown area has rebellious saloons instead of pubs for lunch time. But a sports pub was found upshore near the historical society.
    • Downtown Waukegan is also full of people doing what South Lansing-Michigan calls the Death Row Shuffle. That is to say, no obvious reason to live. So (assuming Waukegan like South Lansing) watch out if you park a bike there, they may steal your dirty laundry.

    The Domination of Eiler is currently raiding Waukegan (and several secluded beaches) from Zion-Illinois, whose own Invasion Zone reaches up to Kenosha-Wisconsin. In Zion people live to drink, judging from the fine restaurants near the Illinois Beach Resort. The Dominator can run with that hunt.

    Anyway... Either the Waukegan job comes through in the next day or so, or the Domination starts raiding anywhere from anywhere.

    3 May 2010

    Talk Back!
    Birthday Presents for the Dominator
    Tres de Mayo is a birthday celebration, after all.

  • Facebook submitted lots of birthday greetings. It seems an old acquaintance from high school has this same birthday, and we never knew.
  • The potential employer in Waukegan-Illinois declined to submit a new job just yet. This should surprise no one who's been following The Waukegan Offensive. But they assured, someone's probably going to be in trouble for not bringing in new personnel on schedule, even though this company is very laid-back about schedules. And they did submit a free lunch.
  • CNN submitted video which shows, the previous employer who brought him to Nashville-Tennessee only to lay him off, is now underwater. The Dominator always wondered how well Nashville's plan of building an industrial park (the Nashville MetroCenter) on a flood plain would work for them. Sorry about the collateral damage, Nashville, but justice is served.
  • The city of Waukegan submitted free admission to its beach on Lake Michigan, at least for those non-documented residents who arrive by bicycle. In support of this ride, the Domination Effect diverted some incoming thunderstorms toward Indiana.
  • Anastasia's Sports Lounge submitted cheap beer, half-price pizza, free wireless Internet, and a place to plug the Domination's main computer in during the Tres de Mayo dinner. The real-blog and fiction-blog web sites are both benefiting.
  • The Illinois Beach Resort will soon submit a nice hotel room for four nights, for free (well, pre-paid in case the Dominator needed to have a wedding there), without quibbling over voucher terms. This is convenient to Waukegan, in case the employer ever does act upon its need for new employees. It's also convenient to bike trails.
  • 1 May 2010

    Talk Back!
    Tres de Mayo / Free Comic Book Weekend 2010
    And a lifestyle change worthy of the Day of Glory, though the Consort might disagree.

    After the recent Florida offensive, the Dominator returned his attention to his northlands. Due to some complicated alliance politics, the Consort did not. For various reasons not relevant to the general public, Dominator and Consort will be conducting separate offensives indefinitely.

    • The wedding part of the alliance is awaiting a better time. Only the One Maker can say when that time may happen.
    • This does not mean the alliance is broken, though. The Dominator has been spending considerable time as the Consort's agent in the North, especially in clearing their shared chambers in Buffalo Grove-Illinois.
    • Yesterday was Evacuation Day. The chambers should be fully vacant by tomorrow. Temporary EilerBase has been established at a hotel in nearby Palatine (the Domination's world headquarters).

    This happens during a Domination of Eiler holiday weekend: Tres de Mayo (the Dominator's ceremonial birthday) and Free Comic Book Day. Free comic books were harvested per holiiday custom, as were finest beer and the Kick Ass movie.

    • During that movie, the Dominator chuckled at apparently inappropriate moments. But what else is one to do, when someone gets eviscerated to a "Tra La La" soundtrack?
    • For the sequel, Kick Ass should either team up with the Sentry or join the Avengers. Those things would make perfect sense in the Marvel Universe. Kick Ass is a Marvel Comics character, after all, even if Marvel is calling itself just "Marv" for purpose of sponsoring this fine movie.

    Tomorrow the Domination of Eiler finally moves upon Waukegan-Illinois, to raise a potential employer from apathy and force a resolution in the coming week. Interview on Monday.

    2 April 2010

    Talk Back!
    The Brand-Name Florida Coasts
    Whatever they're called, they're looking to submit to the Domination of Eiler.

    The Domination of Eiler is on the offensive in Florida. After subjugating South Carolina, its motorized expedition rolled down the First Coast and the Space Coast to occupy the Treasure Coast.

    1. "First Coast" is because the Spanish got there first, decades before that Jamestown and Plymouth Rock stuff that U.S. schoolchildren learn was first. It's around St. Augustine.
    2. "Space Coast" is pretty obvious, because they launch Space Shuttles from there. Hey, there's a mission on Monday - reportedly one of the last four ever! It's around Titusville.
    3. "Treasure Coast" is most famous for sunken Spanish ships. Spaniards had to send their treasure fleets nearby, but showed the good sense to avoid landing here. The U.S. had to bribe settlers to come here after the Seminole Wars... This new American treasure is around Vero Beach.
    4. The area around Tampa is known as the "Sunset Coast". The Dominator and his Consort do enjoy sunsets over the ocean there.
    5. On the Weather Channel this week, they're broadcasting from some part of the Panhandle called the "Emerald Coast". They haven't said why it's called that, though.
    6. This leaves at least two coasts to name. "Mosquito Coast" and "Grand Theft Auto Coast" would probably be good. (Update: One of those is probably the "Nature Coast".)

    Fort Pierce and Port St. Lucie have been expediently chosen as the twin cities of Dominance in Florida. The Consort's already settling in to Port St. Lucie, for a residential job. The Dominator is camping in a cheap hotel in Fort Pierce, and visiting historical museums and Goodwill stores to learn about this new land. If employers continue to be apathetic, much Domination is likely here.

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